Thursday, April 29, 2010

DON'T LET THEM SLIP AWAY

Memories are important, well the good ones at least. I have a favorite one as I'm sure you all do. I'll let you in on it and then I'd like you to tell me yours.
I was born in Tunisia. For those of you who don't know it's the Northern most country in Africa next to Morocco. Every summer I'd go there and stay at my grandparents' house on the beach. One morning, I woke up as the sun began to rise. The sunrise there is pretty special. The sky is purple and orange and the sun's rays sparkle on the water like diamonds. I stood on the balcony and watched as a fisherman rowed his little wooden boat out to sea. The image reminded me of a Monet painting.
Later that day, I watched my grandmother dressed in a long skirt and heels have her afternoon drink. Although she was in her seventies she still had a glass of Johnny Walker in one hand and cigarette in the other. She had big Jackie O sunglasses on and makeup fit for a movie close up. She was a dramatic woman and it felt like she was starring in her own film at all times. She was looking out at the sea and when I called her name she turned abruptly. She was crying. I'll never know why. Maybe she was remembering her daughter that had died 15 years ago or because she'd never made it as an actress. I wish I could have take a picture. It was surreal. Later on, I was playing with the cats that inhabited the big garden. My grandfather was sick, we'd find out later that he had cancer. I guess I was making too much noise because all of a sudden I heard a terrifying howl come from his room. I had woken up the beast within and he was not pleased. He came out with the ferociousness of a lion and started swinging his cane in the air as obscenities emerged from his cries. My mother was there along with my cousin and brothers and we all hid in the fig tress too frightened to climb down. We were laughing so hard our sides hurt because the whole situation was comical. It felt like a Marx brothers movie. My grandmother who was on her fourth or fifth drink slammed her bedroom door and I could hear her yelling from within.
I don't know why but this memory is dear to my heart. My grandparents are dead today and the house on the beach has been sold. I still dream of it sometimes. I still dream of the times when we were all a family, a dysfunctional one but still a family. I long for those days of heavenly sunrises and hilarious outbursts due to too much whiskey or out of control egos. Maybe one day I will see that house on the beach again...
Till next time.

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

REMEMBER... REMEMBER...

Amidst all the chaos and noise and corruption we have forgotten why we are here. This planet is a test... well it could be. Something more powerful than us that we cannot understand made our lives here possible. The problem is that we have nothing left to hope for, to love or to work for. There's so much darkness and sadness clouding this planet that we have no idea what life is all about. Greed. Power. Envy. Anger. Hate. Discrimination. Do you even remember what a good life is? Hundreds of years ago I'd be willing to bet my life that people were much happier. Life was simple and the age of technology and corrupt leaders hadn't even been born. We find ourselves fighting a battle that doesn't have anything to do with us. Stop and think for moment. What happened to finding your soulmate? What happened to visiting new countries and learning about the world? What happened in doing a job that satisfies you creatively and mentally? These are questions that have gone down the toilet like a dead goldfish because are minds have been intoxicated with believing that they are delusions. Well they're not. They're real and if you really tried to make them happen they will. You'll need a deep cleanse of your mind, body and soul first. We're drowning in a sea of hate but the beach is right there in front of us... just a few meters away. Sadly, life has persuaded us that it's just an illusion.
That is our tragedy...

Monday, April 26, 2010

TEMPTATION: THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY

The joys of temptation. You begin to feel tingly all over and you know a desire or fantasy is about to come true. It's almost like the Apple in the Garden of Eden. You know you want to but there is always a price to pay. Sometimes you want it so badly that you'd put your life at stake. Is it worth it? Well, it depends on what it is your heart desires. For some it could be another woman, escaping from life in an opium den in Thailand or climbing Mount Kilimanjaro. You know the moments I'm talking about. Your skin feels all prickly and you can actually hear your heartbeat. So should one say yes or no to temptation? Well, ladies and gents that depends.
Let's look at one scenario. Jack is a middle-aged man who's been in a marriage that was passionate and fun for about fifteen seconds but now it's been ten years and his wife has turned into his worst nightmare. A blend of Glenn Close in "Fatal Attraction" and Annette Bening in "American Beauty." She's lost all desire for him and complains all day long. When he gets home she throws daggers at his soul filled with her toxic words. One sunny day, Jack meets a beautiful girl. She's like a Pre- Raphaelite painting. She makes him feel alive again and he can finally breathe. Her smile has all sorts of messages hidden behind it. Come to me. Let me take care of you. Use me to escape this dreadful relationship you're bound to. Should Jack get lost in her world or should he be honorable and continue his simple and lifeless existence? I'm not advocating being unfaithful but I say go for it Jack. Sometimes we need to do something to make us feel whole again even though it goes against what society deems to be right or wrong. Jack may try to reignite the flame in his marriage due to his current fruitful affair. It may wake up the love he once had for his wife that has remained dormant for such a long time.
Another tale would be a young, naive girl moving to the big city. She has high hopes of becoming a star. Unfortunately, the wolves spot her at once and feed off her naivete and youth. Within a couple of months, she's entangled in drugs and sex leaving her bitter and lost. The drugs and the sex fool her into believing that she's a golden goddess until the sun begins to rise. Then, the cold light of morning strips the veil of lies from her eyes and she sees that she's sleeping on a mattress on the floor of a filthy apartment with junkies who already have one foot in the box. Was it worth it to fill the void with lies and deceit because some greasy liar told you he'd make you a star. Yes, it's tempting to live fast and emulate those rock videos where sex, drugs and rock-n-roll seem to be your magic carpet ride to fame and fortune. Before you know it you look down and there's only a void and you fall to pieces.
Well... what do you think? Right now you now you have one. Give in... or run for the hills?
Till next time...

Thursday, April 22, 2010

DO YOU BELIEVE IN FATE?

The ancient Greeks were great believers in fatalism, which means that whatever happens is predestined. We find this belief all over the world, not only throughout history but in our own days as well. In the past, people used to go to oracles to foresee the future. Today many people believe that they can tell your fortune in the cards, read your palm, or predict your future in the stars.
So is it true? Can no man escape his destiny?
There are so many great individuals that famous for doing extraordinary things. Benjamin Franklin, Thomas Edison, William Shakespeare, Moses and so many more. Were these people supposed to become great? Was there future set in stone? There are so many instances where if a series of events hadn't occurred we may have still been living without electricity, famous cathedrals or musical instruments. I believe they were destined for greatness because in the long run it aided humanity in evolving as a species.
Do you remember the day you saw your soul mate? I bet you do. Whether or not anything grew from that first encounter isn't important. They were put in your path for a reason. Maybe you did nothing about it because you were married or depressed or too broke to even think about being in a relationship but you knew in the deepest, darkest corners of your soul that they were the one. Would it have made a difference in your life if you'd reacted to the encounter or none at all? Hundreds of years ago people believed that it would make or break your chances of being somebody or attaining happiness or success. Today we don't really pay much attention to such things and move along rather quickly without thinking about such encounters for too long.
I believe that life is a test. There are moments that will define our future but the question remains... are these moments predestined? Is your future already written somewhere in the Universe?
I'd like for you to tell me what you think.
Till next time...

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

THE PERFECT DATE

What is the perfect date? Is there even such a thing? It's different for everybody. For some it could be a candlelit dinner followed by a long walk on the beach. For others it could be trying a new exotic restaurant together and salsa dancing to end the night. There's no right or wrong answer here. It's simply a matter of taste. Isn't it funny though how wrong a date can be? You spend so much time planning it and overanalyzing every single detail that it ends up doing quite a number on your nerves. Here is my idea of the perfect date.
To begin with, I have to admit that I have a penchant for men with long hair, tattoos don't hurt either. I've been this way since I was 15. So my date would start off by picking me up in an old car, preferably one from the 60's or 70's. He would knock on my door and he would wait a little before I opened up... make him sweat a bit. I would then open the front door in a black, vintage mini-dress and black, knee-high boots. These are not important facts but it's all in the details. He would be wearing faded jeans and a leather jacket. His hair would be down and he would smell like a man. There's nothing worse than being attacked by overpriced cologne. We would size each other up for a minute longing for the end of the night when that first kiss would happen. Sorry but you have to work for the meaningful things in life. Too much too soon has never been on my agenda. Like I said, a little sweating never hurt anybody. After the brief five minute physical approval we would drive off to a fondue restaurant where they have live entertainment... belly dancers. Let's just pretend for a minute that this restaurant exists. We would be sitting on plush cushions in a dark candle lit corner of the restaurant... the darkest corner. In each corner there would be dark-haired beauties slithering along to the music making the air slightly warm. We would share all sorts of exotic foods dipped in hot, melted chocolate. The strawberries would arrive last, of course. Throughout the meal, we'd exchange stories of our past and hopes and dreams. Our hands would briefly touch every once in a while, maybe as you handed me a napkin or helped me up. After the meal, we'd leave and go to a bar on the beach where you sit on rugs in the sand. A live band would be there playing a who's who of rock's finest music. The night air would be soothing and relaxing. We'd both be drunk from having mentally stimulated one another over dinner. We would continue talking as the waves crashed on the shore.
At around one or two in the morning, I would be driven home. There would be so much tension that we'd both have butterflies. I'd get walked to my door and the man would slowly put his hand behind my neck and give me a kiss fit for an Aerosmith music video. He's tighten his grasp and run his hands through my hair. He'd then look into my eyes and we'd both know that the best was yet to come.
Well... want to tell me what your idea of a perfect date is? Don't worry... I won't bite.
Till next time...

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

THE VOICE THAT MAKES ME DREAM

He was born on September 22, 1951 in Saltburn-by- the -Sea, North Yorkshire, England. As a teenager he was in numerous unknown bands and worked in a clothing shop until he saw an advertisement in 1973 in Melody Maker. A band was looking for a vocalist. He had no idea that he would ultimately be replacing Ian Gillan, who had given notice to leave the band. His name is Davis Coverdale and the band was Deep Purple.
The first time I heard Coverdale sing I was laying out by the pool feeling rather blue. The sunshine was swept away by a wave of clouds and it began to rain. I rushed inside and watched my plan of soaking up the sun go down the drain. All of a sudden, I heard a song come on the radio. It began like this: " I have often told you stories about the way. I lived the life of a drifter, waiting for the day..." It was the intro to " Soldier of Fortune". I was hooked. I was enamored and enchanted by this angelic yet pained voice filling the room with song. The song tells the story of a man who is lost, wishing his lover would stay. In my opinion, it's one of the most honest and moving ballads in rock history. It made me feel vulnerable and I could feel the sadness coming through the speakers. I immediately wanted to know everything bout the man with the golden voice. I had no idea that the lead singer of Whitesnake had also been in Deep Purple. For those of you who haven't heard "Soldier of Fortune" here are the lyrics and I hope you'll listen o the song.

I have often told you stories
About the way
I lived the life of a drifter
Waiting for the day
When I'd take your hand
And sing you songs
Then maybe you would say
Come lay with me love me
And I would surely stay

But I feel I'm growing older
And the songs that I have sung
Echo in the distance
Like the sound
Of a windmill goin' 'round
I guess I'll always be
A soldier of fortune

Many times I've been a traveller
I looked for something new
In days of old
When nights were cold
I wandered without you
But those days I thougt my eyes
Had seen you standing near
Though blindness is confusing
It shows that you're not here

Now I feel I'm growing older
And the songs that I have sung
Echo in the distance
Like the sound
Of a windmill goin' 'round
I guess I'll always be
A soldier of fortune
I can hear the sound
Of a windmill goin' 'round
I guess I'll always be
A soldier of fortune

Are you mesmerized? If you have good taste and know a thing or two about rock music then you'll feel the same way I do. My adoration of this song led me to a completely new side of Coverdale's capabilities as a singer. He'd already made me feel the anguish of lost love and yearning for someone to love. Now he proved that he had the powerful grit of a blues singer with "Mistreated." The song makes your blood pump and you feel like tearing off whatever is holding you down or making you ache and screaming " I've been mistreated! I've been abused!" The slithering guitar riffs by Ritchie Blackmore makes your spine tingle and our senses come to life. The permanent state of slumber so many people experience will dissolve after hearing a song that is packed full os sex, anger and pure blues rock-n-roll. The man with the voice that can make you weep as well as scream is David Coverdale. He is the voice of my emotions. Try him on for size and you'll be begging for more.
Till next time...

Monday, April 19, 2010

LOVE IS A BATTLEFIELD

For thousands of years people have analyzed, written about and obsessed about love. From Shakespeare to Margaret Mitchell, writers and poets have have written countless stories about every kind of love under the sun. Films like Titanic or A Streetcar Named Desire have made us hope to be struck with the fire and passion that being in love brings. Songs ranging from U2's "With or Without You" to Deep Purple's "Mistreated" take us on a journey where we can feel the agony and longing that comes hand in hand with falling for someone. It doesn't matter if it's love at first sight, friendship that turns into a relationship or a passionate one night stand the results are usually the same. My question is: With all the books, music and films that describe every aspect of love, how come we are still so clueless about one of the oldest topics in history?
I think... let me re-phrase that, I know that it's because we are our own worst enemy. We don't listen to our gut instinct, which is usually right. We want immediate satisfaction and we don't want to work at anything in matters of the heart. We expect too much from others and compare them to the perfect, imaginary partner in our minds. As a child, I was madly in love with Val Kilmer in "Willow." His portrayal of Mad Martigan was my idea of the ideal man. He was a warrior, brave to the bone, dark, seductive, funny and loyal. Unfortunately, as I grew older I realized that if I set the bar at that level I would be alone forever. I had to realize that the hero in my head would only come to life in dreams or fantasies. There's no war, or poverty, or disease in our imagination. It's like our own little piece of heaven where knights in shining armors do exist.
In the real world, fear and fear alone, is why love is still nature's best kept secret because there's no book or commandments on how to find it. Love isn't perfect sex, perfect friendship or perfect minds coming together. Love is about finding an imperfect person perfectly. It's about understanding that life is the battlefield and it's better if you have someone by your side to fight the war with you. Most people run away if there's intimacy problems, financial woes or misunderstandings. They forget that for every problem there is always a solution. Self-help books aren't going to give you the golden ticket and money only buys happiness just for a moment. Love is the only thing that cannot be bought. It usually has to be earned.
People confuse love and lust on a daily basis. I've done it countless times in my life. You meet someone that you find unbelievably attractive physically and that ignites all your senses during intimacy and you think it's true love. After that, if they turn out to be the worst possible mate we make excuses for them to keep that lust alive. Wrong!! You are on dangerous territory and you won't keep your head above water for much longer.
Let me tell you a little tale: When I was eighteen, I met a man that was much older than me. I thought he was Don Juan DeMarco come to life. I longed for his presence all day long and stayed awake at night fretting about when I would see him again. Lust was the only component in this relationship that made it last as long as it did... three years to be exact. This man manipulated me to the very end and left me lifeless and sick. He was a monster. He wasn't my friend, he wasn't around when I had problems or needed him for support and he couldn't have cared less about my well-being since he got me addicted to drugs. I still believed that he was the one, forgiving all his mistakes for the one element that was strong... lust.
Do yourself a favor. Stop searching for love. Stop staying in abusive relationships with people that are practically sucking you dry like a vampire. Love is the little things. Watching a sunset together, being there when they're sick, wanting them to succeed and listening to their hopes and dreams. Fear and selfishness are incredibly difficult to extinguish but when you meet the one it won't be impossible an longer.
When it comes to love be a realist. Don't fear the unknown and recoil into your shell at the first sign of a speed bump. In that respect, be like Mad Martigan. Be brave and be bold because you may never get that chance again. True love is worth fighting for and you will have to fight for it. Anything you obtain too easily is usually misleading.
A poet once said that "It's so easy, To think about Love, To Talk about Love, To wish for Love, But it's not always easy, To recognize Love, Even when we hold it.... In our hands." Can you deal with that?
Till next time...

Friday, April 16, 2010

LIBERTINE... TO BE OR NOT TO BE?

The Marquis de Sade, John Wilmot, the 2nd Earl of Rochester and Joseph Bonaparte all had something in happen. They were libertines, which means one devoid of most moral restraints, which are seen as unnecessary or undesirable. They ignore the trends that society as a whole follow and pretty much dance to their own tune. Scandals and imprisonment usually comes hand in hand with being a libertine. The Marquis de Sade used to lure young prostitutes as well as employees of both sexes back to his castle. He was later imprisoned for his writings, which combined philosophy and pornography. You see, even in the 1700's they had censorship issues and nobody was really free. Do we need the libertine philosophy to grow? I believe we do.
Sex has probably been one of the most controversial topics since men roamed the Earth. There have been so many rules telling people what they are allowed to do or say that it is still a topic that makes most very uncomfortable. A little bit of truth, obscenity and erotica never hurt anybody. Wouldn't it be nice to be free from the shackles society has bound us in. How pleasant it would be to get rid of all these unnecessary restraints. For those of you that think Jim Morrison is cooler than cool... listen up.
Here's how to join the ranks of some of the most controversial men in history.
-First, you can start off by letting go of old habits. Break free of your daily routine and and throw caution to the wind. Let's see where the day takes you.
- Embrace change. Do something you've always fantasized of doing but never mustered up enough courage to do... until now. Ask out that pretty girl you've been eyeing or go to a place that makes you feel alive.
- Follow your impulses. I don't mean drinking until you pass out because you had a bad day at work either. I mean to ignore the hesitation that takes over when you are about to experience something new. Libertines swear by this code.
- Challenge yourself, especially your judgement. Too many people spend their lives strolling easy street and obeying every single rule that comes their way. Challenge those rules every once in a while because that's how you discover new opinions. Discover new groups or activities that you find shocking and try to understand them.
- Learn about the notorious libertines of the past. Ravage their books, songs or ideas. Trust me, you'll find you you can identify with a lot more than you'd think. The parallels are endless.
- Finally, never settle for less. Never accept anything that doesn't move you. You must follow your passions in order to come to life.
Well folks... can you dig it or are you afraid? The Marquis de Sade once said: " Happiness lies neither in vice nor in virtue; but in the manner we appreciate the one and the other, and the choice we make pursuant to our individual organization." How about lighting your own fire for once?
Till next time...

Thursday, April 15, 2010

ARE YOU A CYNIC, A STOIC OR AN EPICUREAN?

Today's pearls of wisdom will require you to analyze yourself. Don't worry it's not as scary as it sounds. The Greeks used to classify their people into three different categories. The main emphasis was on finding out what true happiness was and how it could be achieved. We are going to look at three of these philosophical trends. Are you ready?
The Cynics emphasized that true happiness isn't found in external advantages such as material luxury, political power or good health. True happiness doesn't depend on random and fleeting things. Happiness can't be lost once attained. Cynics believed that people didn't need to be concerned about their health or let themselves be concerned for other people's woes. Nowadays we use terms like "cynical" or "cynicism" to describe a sneering disbelief in human sincerity or to imply insensitivity towards other people's suffering. George Carlin is a prime example of what a cynic is.
The Stoics believed that everyone was part of the same common sense. They thought that each person was like a world in miniature. This led to the thought of universal rightness. Natural law governed all mankind and they considered the legal statutes of various states incomplete imitations of the "law embedded" in nature itself. They believed there was only one nature and the idea was called monism. They drew attention to human fellowship and were interested in politics and encouraged culture and philosophy. They believed that Man must accept his destiny since all natural processes follow the unbreakable laws of nature. Everything happens through necessity and one shouldn't complain when fate comes knocking. They never let their feelings take over. Today we use the term "stoic calm" about someone who does not let his feelings take over. A good example of a Stoic would be Gandhi.
Last but not lease, we have the Epicureans. They believed that the pleasurable results of an action must always be weighed against its possible side effects. To them, pleasure doesn't necessarily mean sensual pleasure like intimacy or eating chocolate. Pleasure could mean the appreciation of friendship or art. Their motto was: " The gods are not to be feared. Death is nothing to worry about. Good is easy to attain. The fearful is easy to endure." They basically lived for the moment. Around the year 300 B.C. one of Socrates's pupils by the name of Aristippus pretty much summed it up. He said " The highest good is pleasure; the greatest evil is pain." The word "epicurean" is used in a negative sense nowadays to describe someone who lives only for pleasure. Karl Marx believed in epicureanism.
So... which one are you? Think long and hard. I like to think that I'm an Epicurean... remembering to always "seize the day." Well, have you made up your mind yet?
Till next time...

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

WHY ARE WE SO AFRAID OF CHANGE?

Change is inevitable. It's like seasons or growing older. It's part of life and there really isn't much we can do to prevent it from knocking on our doors. When it does arrive though, we don't want to answer. We'd rather stay in the comfort of the imaginary walls we've surrounded ourselves by. What we think is safe is sacred to us and we tend to refuse to let anything in that might disrupt this false idea of what is keeping us afloat. Why don't we just go along with nature?
As children, we change schools. We move from elementary school, to middle school, to high school and most of the time to college. Remember how nervous you were on the first day of school? Will they make fun of my name during role call? Will they laugh at my clothes? Will I fit in? In the end, we end up making new friends and eventually feel pretty comfortable. It was scary at first but it all worked out in the end, right? We grow and form new relationships and learn about ourselves and the world around us. At the time we didn't have a choice because you have to go to school.
As adults, nobody is forcing us to change anymore and we end up stuck in a place that we think may be the best we can achieve but it's not. If we stop lying to ourselves to justify our lives then we would see that there is so much more to accomplish. But the thought of taking a step in a direction with no road signs is a nuisance. We don't know what the outcome will be so we just close our eyes and go down the same old path we're used to. This will result in regret when we are old and wiser. I should have asked them to marry me? Why didn't I take that internship in London? Why didn't I go see my mother when she needed me? I should have bought that house when I had the chance? The list goes on and on and on.
Anything in this life that seems like it's going to take a lot of hard work will usually leave you pleasantly surprised. Instant gratification or decisions you already know the answer to are soooooo last season. Now I want you to do something for me. I want you to read this poem by Robert Frost called "The Road Less Traveled." Yes you do have the time. It's a short poem and if you have time to chat on Facebook or update your MySpace then you have time for this which is slightly more productive, in my humble opinion.

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth; 5

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same, 10

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back. 15

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Well, what do you think? I say take the road less traveled. Be brave and get rid of the cowardly mask society shields itself with. Can you handle it?
Till next time...

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

WHAT IS HAPPINESS?

The question that puzzles the entire world: what is happiness? It varies for every person. For some it could be having loads of money in the bank, for others it could be finding the ideal partner or starting a family. All in all, we tend to think that it's something external that will make us feel like we are not alone.
Let's examine this conclusion. If you take newlyweds, for instance, they are in love in the beginning and share countless hopes and dreams. They feel that they will have a partner and a friend to hold their hand as they walk down the road of life. Fast forward ten years. The husband is usually working till late at night to support his housewife and their two children. The stress levels are off the charts and they acknowledge one another's presence in passing or at the dinner table. Intimacy has been flushed down the toilet and there never seems to be any time or energy to do the things they used to love together. Nobody is happy and someone may have an affair or decide that being alone is what happiness really is. To be left alone by all... how ironic.
Another common scenario is the man who works like a mule until he can proudly state that he is rich. He has been so consumed by greed and power that he really doesn't have any real friends... at least not any he can call at 4 in the morning. Paranoia has probably settled in too since in his opinion everyone wants a piece of the action. You can usually find him in four star hotels, eating at an expensive Parisian cafe along the Seine or being enraged by his useless employees. At night when he comes home to his two million dollar mansion in his Bentley, he lays his head neurotic brain on the pillow and will fall asleep after taking a couple of sleeping pills. Guess what... he's alone and if there is another warm body by his side it's usually someone who's getting paid for their time or youth.
There are countless situations where we think that we have to chase for happiness or hunt it until we pretty much have one foot in the box heading six feet under. What is I told you that happiness lies within? That it never was about getting hitched with that waitress who has legs for days, or owning a home on every continent or being on the cover of as many magazines possible a month.
A wise man named Aristotle, you may have heard of him. believed that man can only achieve happiness by using all his abilities and capabilities. He said there were three forms of happiness.
1- A life of pleasure and enjoyment. Example: Watching the sunset or listening to your favorite music.
2- A life as a free and responsible citizen. Example: Treating others the same way you'd like to be treated.
3- A life as thinker and philosopher. Example: Realizing that we know nothing.
Aristotle emphasized that all three criteria must be present at the same time for man to find balance and fulfillment. Therefore, a harmonies life is when the mind, body and soul are in perfect unison. There's a reason why Buddhists are so peaceful.
Maybe if we stopped desperately searching for happiness and began enjoying life we would be... well we'd be in a hell of a lot better shape than we're in today. In the end, it's all about balance. Are you up for it or has your ship already sailed?
Till next time...

Monday, April 12, 2010

CAN BEING IN A COMA EXORCISE YOUR DEMONS?

Can the little devil on your shoulder that tells you to have one more drink or steal those twenties from that register disappear? The one that seems to lift your hand against your will and force you to do things you'll be ashamed of later. He always seems to sneak up on you when you think you've got your life under control. For the most part, we tend to listen to him, to give in to whatever it is he's selling. All in all, he's a very persuasive salesman. I believe that people who are in a coma and wake up will be given the opportunity to have a blank slate. The little devil will no longer have a firm grasp on your actions. At the very least, you'll see him coming.
Now I'm not saying go get in a car accident or to take a bunch of pills to try to be in a coma. I'm just pointing out something that I find to be true because I've witnessed it. I will tell you a true story now leaving out names and places. Read it carefully and think about it.
Once upon a time there was a person who had everything they wanted. A happy home life, lots of friends and countless hopes and dreams. They were adored by all and romantically pursued by many. Then one day, they became bored with their lives and started drinking enormous quantities of alcohol. A bottle of wine here, three shots of tequila there and a splash of whiskey everywhere. Oh my!! The fun has just begun, for you see this person eventually thought that alcohol became quite dull after a while. What to do? The answer is pills of all shapes and sizes. A pill to feel happy, a pill to feel sleepy and of course a pill to feel sexy. Is that what made this person fall into a coma? No... unfortunately for them it was not. It was only the beginning... the appetizer if you will. Soon after this person was tired of feeling hungover and loopy all the time. What to do? Cocaine, of course. Fast-forward three years and this person finds themselves on the ledge of a fourth story window. They've taken a lethal cocktail of all these poisons and feels hopeless. Moments of hopelessness are as dangerous as hungry sharks. They lurk in the dark and move in for the kill when you least except it. Well... this person jumped, naturally. After being in a coma for a week this person awoke and was different. I don't mean they preferred vanilla over chocolate or thought Brad Pitt was hotter than Johnny Depp now. I mean they felt like they'd been scrubbed clean of their demons. The addictions, the lying, the stealing, the promiscuity, the self-loathing... it was all gone. After they regained their place back in society, they became a proper, mindful citizen again. They transformed into the person that was hiding under all those layers of filth for so long. Today this person is someone that we can all learn from and who is living life for all it's worth.
So the question is: How did this transformation happen? There were no pills or meeting involved. No brain surgeries or mind-altering drugs. It happened... just like that. Can your spirit be cleansed when your soul is dormant? I think it can. I think when our minds are still something magical can happen. This accident was unfortunate but it could it have been a miracle in disguise for this person? Do tragedies have to happen for us to " see the light?" The Lord works in mysterious ways...
Till next time.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

A Place In the Sun

When was the last time you took a vacation? I don't mean listening to the last thirty seconds of "Key Largo" at a red light or reading where Brad and Angie had dinner in People Magazine on the stairclimber. I'm talking about being several hours on a plane and landing in a tropical paradise where you can actually breathe. That's right... breathe.
We end up spending most of our lives struggling or addicted to our jobs. For some, work means financial security or an escape from a nightmarish home-life. For others, it's about survival and sometimes one job just isn't enough to lead a secure life. There never seems to be enough time or money to bring your life to a halt and listen to your mind and body which are in desperate need of sea, sex and sun. It's corny but the expression "Fun in the sun" really does take the stress away. You should try it.
Now once you've taken the steps and found the courage to scream " I NEED a break!!!!", then you need to jump on the first plane to Thailand. I don't need to explain why this is where all your problems will dissolve but I will say this: If you liked Peter Pan then this country is Neverland for adults.
Once you've landed in Thailand you'll realize how ridiculously expensive your hometown is. Fresh fruit is only fifty cents? An hour foot massage for five dollars? A hooker that'll stay with you all night for thirty bucks???? This is where dreams do come true.
Now before you get your panties in a twist because I mentioned hookers I'll have you know that it's not a taboo topic or illegal or looked down upon. For the women there it's sell soup on the street and live in a hole or work at a go-go bar to support yourself and your family who still lives in a rice field. Once you've opened your mind and adopted a more bohemian attitude about all this then you should know that once you go... you'll never want to come home. You'll handcuff yourself to a bench, if necessary.
You'll explore the infamous Walking Street in Pattaya by the beach where they still play great rock n roll music. From the bars to the live music you'll feel like you're in a Motley Crue video except nobody goes to jail and you'll still have plenty of cash to keep the smile on your face from fading. Let's see who takes a flight out now. Must I dare you to go?
Till next time...

Friday, April 9, 2010

FEAR



We were once giggling children more pre-occupied with puppies and Barbies rather than constantly worrying about our weight or how sexually desirable we are. We used to wait in anticipation for our favorite cartoon to come on or to go jump in the lake with our friends. There was a complete sense of freedom and wonder. What happened?
As we grow older, we become obsessed with what is socially acceptable. We persuade ourselves that by avoiding the unknown we will be safe forever. Change is bad... it's unpredictable. We set up barriers that withhold us from blossoming and instead keep us trapped like a caged bird.
Throughout history, there have been individuals who stood up for their beliefs and embraced being different. Some of them lost their lives like Socrates or Martin Luther King Jr. but these are the figures we remember. They will remain immortal and although some may admire them we usually leave it at that. What would the others think if I shouted what I really thought? Think about it. If you swept away your fear at pivotal moments in your life maybe your life would be different. Those fantasies floating around in your head could come true. A moment of passion where you can hear " With Or Without You" playing in your head wouldn't be just wishful thinking. Who cares? What have you got to lose?
If nobody took chances and stayed at home drinking Coke on the couch wishing they were Meg Ryan or Tom Hanks in Sleepless in Seattle nothing would happen. Life would come to a halt and there would be... nothing. Just millions of lost souls stuck in square one for eternity. Think about it... the fear. Think long and think hard.
What would our world be like today if there was no Sistine Chapel, no "Romeo and Juliet," no telephone or no planes?
The next time you feel the sharp tentacles of fear creeping up your spine just take a deep breath and do something you'll be smiling about later instead of being swallowed whole by regret and eating chocolate all by your lonesome.
Till next time...

AMERICAN BEAUTY

What is beauty? Is it having the perfect body or flawless skin? Could it be having long, flowing hair or perfectly round breasts? Like all things in life there is a price to pay, especially when it comes to our looks. The physical seems to be all that matters when in reality we are creating an illusion. Inside, there is a giant void that is momentarily filled by our false satisfaction of our reflection in a mirror staring blankly back at us. What happened to accepting oneself and growing from the inside out? Is it really worth harming ourselves to feel desired? Does pain equal happiness? Why must we suffer to feel like we fit in? The answer is because the media has convinced us that looking a certain way will solve all our problems. Apparently, being a size zero and looking like a mannequin will bring us wealth, the perfect partner, a job we love and immortality. Really? I don't think so. At a young age we are manipulated into believing that all our efforts should be channeled into achieving a Barbie-like exterior. Forget education, culture and character. No, these things aren't important. Unfortunately, they are. Think of it as a pie. A freshly baked pie right out of the oven. Your mouth waters when you think of the juicy fruit waiting inside. Maybe it's peaches or apples. You slowly cut a piece being careful not to ruin it's flawless shell and... there's nothing in it. It's just a shell. What's so interesting about an empty shell? I don't know... you tell me.
Till next time...